One Year Ago Part I

19 Sep

A year ago this week I was in a very different place. The Narc was busy with his online affair with the “old lover (that [he] still care[s] for)” and I had just received news that The Old Boss was making changes to the company’s retirement account and I needed to move what turned out to be $12K into a new account where it would be super easy to withdraw any time I wanted to finally Get Out. The Narc was suddenly all smiles and full of ideas about what I should do with my money.

I was still recovering from his latest round of Gaslighting, pissed about bills that I was suddenly expected to pay, trying to keep my mouth shut about his made-up dispute with the neighbors and getting more and more frustrated and angry as I found the language to name his abuses. I was distancing myself in preparation of fleeing for my sanity.

On the weekend, there was a Fiber Event that I wanted to attend. Because I was angry, I did not formally invite the Narc to come along and that led to a six-hour lecture that started out being about how I am an uncaring bitch for not inviting him along and ended with how I am an uncaring bitch for not letting him carry on an internet affair with his old lover. I attended the Event, ranted to poor Awana about what a dick he is and nearly killed myself driving 5 hours to and from on no food. The next day was more of the same.

This year is about as different as it can be and still be my life. The Event is next weekend and I am looking forward to attending, but my feelings are mixed. I hope the Narc hasn’t ruined it for me.

This year the only time constraint I have is Crazy Helper Dog. Absolutely No Dogs are Allowed Anywhere on the Property, so Sabu will have to stay home with Lil’ Dude. Oh, I won’t be gone longer than her bladder can hold out, but she will be sure to let me know that I’ve been gone forever!ohmygod!forever!!!

I plan to take a bunch of pictures and maybe even buy a thing or two. Details next weekend.

Also, I booked an appointment for Lil’ Dude to have his balls cut off and needles stuck into him. Gotta keep him healthy! I’m hoping his Procedure will slow him down for a couple of days so I can get a full night’s sleep.


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13 responses to “One Year Ago Part I

  1. Twindaddy

    September 19, 2013 at 8:31 pm

    I am so happy that you’re in a much better place now.

  2. JackieP

    September 19, 2013 at 9:14 pm

    You go girl! Lil dude will be fine and so will the crazy dog helper. haha! It will slow lil dude down about ohhhhh a few hours anyway. Sleep well. 😉

    • Sofia Leo

      September 23, 2013 at 9:59 am

      Having Auntie Awana over on Saturday seemed to wear both cat and dog out – they napped all day Sunday and didn’t start rioting until 0500 this AM! I know they’ll be fine, but will act like I’m a horrible person for abandoning them when I get back.

  3. behindthemaskofabuse

    September 19, 2013 at 10:11 pm

    I echo TD!

  4. Melanie

    September 20, 2013 at 6:22 am

    I hope Event so enjoyable that you are distracted from the memories of past events and that you enjoy every minute of it.

    • Sofia Leo

      September 23, 2013 at 10:00 am

      Me, too! It will be fine, as all time spent around my Tribe is fine. Hopefully I’ll be able to find some cashmere and silk to add to The Stash…

  5. Lynette d'Arty-Cross

    September 20, 2013 at 1:34 pm

    Glad that you’re out of there – forget about that dickhead and enjoy the event! 🙂

    • Sofia Leo

      September 23, 2013 at 10:01 am

      If only forgetting him was easy. I still hear his voice in my head, but now I argue with it, sometimes even ranting, demanding that he just leave me the fuck alone already. I hope that goes away soon.

  6. El Guapo

    September 21, 2013 at 11:47 am

    Nah. This week you’ll go, and people will say “Haven’t seen you since last year. How have you been?”
    And you’ll think about it for a minute – getting teh mobile home, packing up what was important to you, everything you’ve done, not just on your own, but despite what the narc (no,I won’t capitalize him) would have had you do, and the new life you’ve built and are still building for yourself.
    And hopefully, realizing everything has changed, you’ll go nuts and enjoy the hell out of yourself at the event, and have more fun then ever, and maybe even join some sewing circles, or however it is groups like that socialize!

    Have fun .and congrats on the new life!

    • Sofia Leo

      September 23, 2013 at 10:04 am

      And I’ll actually get to visit and spend some real time getting to know people! This might be the first year that I’ve gone and had no constraints on my time. I won’t be sitting in on the spinning circle, though, as my new/old Irish wheel doesn’t travel very well. I’ll be taking your suggestion and no longer capitalizing narc, too – it’s time to make his importance even smaller 🙂


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