On Saturday I traveled up to Portland (1.5+ hours by car) to help Roxy hand out samples of her vegan dog biscuits at VegFest 2013. She’s a sweet older woman who has a heart of gold, but damn! She steps on my last nerve some days.
She requested that I meet her at the house of her long-time friends no later than 0830. Fine. I got up at 0530, made the long drive and arrived on time. My first clue that the day was not going to go according to plan was when I knocked on the door and saw a woman in a bathrobe approaching. Sigh. It was Roxy’s friend, and no, she was not yet dressed for the day. Turns out Roxy was not dressed either, and was in fact still doing her morning yoga. She also hadn’t eaten breakfast yet. WTF?!?
I had to make small talk with her friends for nearly an hour before Roxy was ready to drive to the convention center. I sucked it up and behaved like an adult, concealing my irritation as best I could. I mean, really – if she knew she wouldn’t be ready until 0930, why did she make a special point to request my presence at 0830? Just to fuck with me? To annoy her hosts? To see if I could handle the pressure of meeting and making nice with people I have nothing in common with? I don’t know, but it wasn’t the first time I sat cooling my heels waiting on her.
Anyway. Roxy drove to the convention center while I navigated. Holy crap does she drive fast! And she’s not all that concerned with staying inside the lines, either! I managed to yelp in fear only once, which prompted her to look over at me and ask if I was alright. A long, lingering look while doing 65 in a 55 zone on the freeway! I swallowed all sounds other than what exit to take after that.
As we were walking into the convention center, I noticed some garishly dressed people heading in the same direction. Roxy was marching along at warp speed, not looking back, so I only caught glimpses as I rushed by. It all became clear as we neared the hall where the VegFest was being held – the Rose City Comicon was going on in the very next room! That’s right – my people were right there and I was stuck with the vegans all day!
There were storm troopers:
And ghost busters:
Oodles of sassy women dressed up as characters I couldn’t readily identify:
Quite a few dudes who take their cosplay VERY seriously:
Lots of family groups all dressed up together:
And even more storm troopers:
All photos borrowed from KATU.com because I was not allowed to leave the room to take pictures. Sob!
But, no. Since I was there, Roxy took the opportunity to visit with everyone selling and giving samples away, leaving me at the table to talk and talk and talk to militant vegans all day. Nothing against vegans – this group was just weird. She did allow me a couple of bathroom breaks, but since we were quite close to the restroom I didn’t need to go far. By the end of the day my voice was gone and I was exhausted from standing on the concrete floor leaning over the table for hours and hours.
I was bummed, to say the least. My reward for this day (and lots of hand holding and computer work over the past couple of months)? A gift certificate for a 90-minute massage by Roxy’s favorite masseuse. In Waldport, which is a 2-hour drive away. Sigh. She really doesn’t get me at all. She knows my story, yet she thinks that I should be thrilled at the prospect of a total stranger rubbing my naked body for 90 minutes. Really? I specifically asked for dog biscuits for Sabu. Or chocolate. Something cheap and easy so I didn’t feel obligated, but that’s not how Roxy works.
I really have nothing against Roxy, just venting. I would have loved to see if I could find a Star Trek communicator pin, or a mini Tardis to set on my desk. Instead I saw the most amazing variety of facial piercings and dreadlocks and smelled “vegan seafood” cooking all day. Let me tell you, it ain’t bacon.