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As I Write, You Disappear

09 Feb

Last week, Kimberly Harding posted some words of wisdom about the healing powers of writing and other art and this poem that sums up exactly why I write this blog. She has graciously allowed me to quote her here:

As I Write…

As I write, you disappear.

Your silly whims and,
less than silly anger,
dissipate and
disappear
with my marks upon page.

What power have you?
You can not construct;
you only destruct.

While I, I in my
infinite wisdom,
take pen to paper

and absolve you
of everything –

including your hold upon me.

I do feel that he’s disappearing from my life, one word at a time. His hold over me has dissolved and I can breathe again. He continues to be civil, not calling me, not stopping by my work. He has sent a few e-mails asking questions about computer stuff, but that’s it. He tries to draw me in to what is happening in his life, but those notes go unanswered.

I choose what to respond to and I choose to treat him like an annoying co-worker, communicating only when necessary and only about those things that demonstrate my superior intelligence and experience. Petty, sure, but he never realized how much he relied upon me to keep his day-to-day life running smoothly and now that he’s noticing, well, I want him to squirm a little 🙂

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13 Comments

Posted by on February 9, 2013 in Emotional Abuse, I totally Rock!, Poetry, Truth?

 

Tags: , ,

13 responses to “As I Write, You Disappear

  1. Not Quite Alice

    February 9, 2013 at 9:47 am

    <3.

     
  2. JackieP

    February 9, 2013 at 10:06 am

    hey a little revenge is sometimes necessary. You are growing stronger every day and I”m so proud of you! big hugs

     
  3. behindthemaskofabuse

    February 9, 2013 at 10:25 am

    you sound so empowered! xo

     
  4. Just Me With . . .

    February 9, 2013 at 11:28 am

    Writing does help, tremendously. So does reading about the stories of others and doing research on narcissism. Glad to hear about your progress.

     
    • Sofia Leo

      February 9, 2013 at 8:42 pm

      Without research, this blog and the wonderful WP community, I might still be wallowing in a deep pool of self doubt, uncertain if I was even sane, much less deserving of a better life. I have all of you to thank for my new found freedom!

       
  5. Jenny

    February 9, 2013 at 8:54 pm

    You’ve finally found happiness and it all began with-YOU! Enjoy!!

     
  6. El Guapo

    February 12, 2013 at 11:02 am

    Annoying coworker sounds like an excellent description.
    Soon I hope he’ll be downgraded to “this guy I had to work with”…

     
    • Sofia Leo

      February 13, 2013 at 11:23 am

      He was great as a co-worker. He did his work, didn’t expect anyone to pick up his slack, was respectful, funny, knowledgeable, great with the clients, just fabulous. Anything closer emotionally is a disaster, but as a co-worker, I have rarely had better.

       

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